Sunday, April 01, 2007

April 1, 2007

Ben's first telephone conversation with a peer (on speakerphone):

Friend: Hi Ben.

Ben: Hi.

[crickets chirping]

F: Do you have something in your house that looks like poop?

B: Probably!

F: You could put it on the ground and say you pooped!

B: Yeah!

F: Bye Ben!

B: Bye!

In a fit of festivity, I made the children fool eggs with whipped cream and apricot halves and sliced pound cake for toast, and Ben fell for it for approximately, let's see, zero seconds. "Why are these eggs so foamy looking?" he said. "This toast looks so weird." Birdy insisted that the egg tasted like whipped cream, and then we were never convinced she'd understood the whole thing. "My egg was so creamy!" she cried. "April fool!" Still! I did an April Fool's joke! Lame and cranky me! I like the bonus holidays like these, where anything is better than nothing. Nobody expects you to make a Luke Skywalker pinata or rent a team of Clydesdales or anything.

But more successful was the cramming of a long strip of toilet paper down the back of everyone's pants and groaning, "Oh gross! We've really got to teach you more about wiping."

How did you celebrate? Don't leave me hanging. Tell me.

40 comments:

  1. We didn't do anything, but Mother Nature pulled a big one on us. We took our daughter (5 in May) to her soccer game on a bright, sunny afternoon, and just as they were starting the 3rd quarter, clouds formed out of nowhere at all and it absolutely poured the rain. They called the game after a couple of minutes, we all raced to our vehicles, and as soon as we'd cleared the field, ti was bright and sunny again.

    Also, this is the 2nd blog where I've read about the fake egg today. Judging from the pictures in the other one, vanilla yogurt might have been more visually convencing.

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  2. Ah, the Bonus Holidays are where I truly shine, my one strength as a mother. It's The Feast of The Ephiphany! Queen Victoria's Birthday! National Penguin Day! You name it, I've made a theme meal for it. My kids are going to become resolutely anti-holiday by the time they're 10, of course.

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  3. Did it seem weird to anyone else that Palm Sunday fell on April first this year? "It's Palm Sunday! April Fool!" ???

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  4. That phone conversation is so funny. Our oldest, when he was in 1st grade, had a phone conversation that was one knock-knock joke followed by good-bye.

    For April Fools Day, what I did was keep saying in a bored monotone, "We do not use April Fools jokes to make other people feel bad" as my two oldest kept saying things like, "Hey, Rob, you can have some of this candy! April Fools!" and "Hey, William, I'll play a game with you! April Fools!"

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  5. 1. My toddler and I plotted to tell her mom (who slept in) that the kid and I had eaten burritos and asparagus for breakfast. When mom woke up, the toddler told her this, and then waited a professional-quality beat before yelling, "April fool!"

    2. At bath time, the toddler got me by telling me that no, we didn't have to wash her hair. When I looked quizzical, she said, "April Fool, and we do have to wash the hair!"

    3. My wife refused to prank the girlfriends she was meeting for lunch by telling them that she was pregnant. Wimp.

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  6. Ugh. I am terrible when it comes to April Fool's jokes. My dad was the king and loved to pull one over on us, but I just don't have the talent. I suppose that's a bit of a cop-out though given that it's not too hard to fool a toddler, but STILL.

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  7. We are big nerds and didn't accomplish anything we set out to do today, least of all the accomplishment of an April Fool's Day joke, which would have actually taken forethought and planning. What are you guys, nuts? The laundry is still unfolded and the petunias haven't been planted and are therefore withering on my front porch.

    I wish I could yell "April Fool" to you all as I am a put-together and totally with-it kind of chick. Alas...

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  8. Oh I like the fake egg trick! My kids just pulled the old "I haven't eaten my boiled egg" gag that they do every week. (You know, turn the empty shell over, pretend you won't eat your egg, cranky mum comes up and puts spoon through shell, exclaims "Oh you tricked me AGAIN!") Except yesterday Simon added some fake barfing noises just to make it more festive and April Fools-like.

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  9. Brooke10:43 PM

    My four year old called my mom (who is schlepping her cookies from Texas to Chicago in June just to see my daughter's ballet recital)--to tell her that they changed the recital and it's next week (somehow, she thought of this one herself). My mom really wigged out and my daughter had a VERY satisfying "APRIL FOOLS" shout on the phone. It was great...(evidently, you forget about such days once the kids are out of the house...).

    The rest of the day was filled with corny: "There's a fly in your hair! April fools." "The fish is talking! April Fools." It didn't end...most of those were from my three year old...not so subtle :-)

    Glad you enjoyed the day! I like the egg idea...

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  10. Tina G10:56 PM

    No April Fool's jokes around here. Son recovering from flu, Husband STILL hobbling around since knee surgery, Daughter thankfully ok at this moment but that changes in an eyeblink, Me still worried about the cats' food that so far was NOT recalled, but they keep adding to the list, you know...Today we just went shopping at Target and then it rained. Can one say "Bah Humbug" about this holiday? Can't wait to read WT tomorrow, though.

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  11. I had grand intentions of doing the fake egg, but instead Daddy made his famous shape pancakes instead. Frogs, unicorns, snakes - oh my.

    What did happen though is the Tooth Fairy forgot to leave her note and two dollars last night. So in a moment of pure genius the Tooth Fairy put the note and two dollars under the bed instead of under the pillow and I "found' it while making the bed this morning. April Fool's and let me tell you it was the biggest hit ever.

    May not have been exactly as planned, but really when is it?

    Happy April Fool's Day!

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  12. This morning, our 6 year old daughter picked up the phone, said "uhuh" a couple of times, smiling, and then, as if a crack had opened into another universe, there she was, very obviously to us, telling an April Fool's joke! She said, convincingly "we're going to have a baby sister or brother soon!". Then she laughed and said "April Fool!" We all sat at the breakfast table, stunned.

    Turns out that our good friend had called, hoping to get our daughter, told her a fairly good April Fool's Day Joke about moving to NY City (which Elena didn't believe), explained the concept, and then coached Elena in thinking one up to tell back. We, the lame adults unable to think up our own jokes, used it several times on other friends throughout the day.

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  13. Let's see...my three-year-old and my five-year-old told us jokes e.g. (from the three-year-old) "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "You" "You who?" "You in the potty, with a poo poo on your head!" (all of her jokes are much the same, usually featuring toilets, poo poos, pee pees, or eyeballs). My son told us yet another mangled version of the "What has four wheels and flies? A garbage truck" joke, i.e. (his version) "What has four wheels and wings and smells like garbage and has a lot of wasps buzzing around it? A garbage truck!" But I laughed more when he asked suddenly, "Hey Dad - do you have any of your foreskin left, or is the end of your penis just bald?"

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  14. My husband told me that the cat left us a "present" on the garage floor. When he saw that the kitty in question was about to meet his doom, he informed me that it was a joke.

    I thought about waking him up this morning and telling him he was REALLY late to work, but I didn't figure a heart attack would be the best way to start the day. :-)

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  15. In the Philippines, April Fools' fell on a Palm Sunday, which is the official beginning of Lent. This is a big deal for Catholics hereabouts, so there was very little fooling around except for what went on under the sheets. @;)

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  16. We were lame (maybe it WAS the Palm Sunday opener and the traditional story of the crucifiction that is just a downer - and it's not even Good Friday yet!). Man, was is it about the poop word that kids adore? I think it'd be fun to use the term feces instead. I laugh just thinking about it. You say tomato...

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  17. I never thought about celebrating April fools! The closest I came yesterday was going to the grocery store and trying to read all the deli food labels upside down, because the man behind the counter thought that would be a really grand april fool joke. Ha. ha. ha.

    Joke was on me, since I couldn't correctly read that the chicken salad I ordered a pound of had lemon in it, which I didn't like and couldn't eat. Again, ha. ha. ha.

    Awesome teleconference with ben by the way.

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  18. Anonymous11:52 AM

    I celebrated by trying to answer the question, "What's the difference between fooling someone and lying?" It only took one try, and then the nuance was perfectly clear to my six year old!
    OK, belated April Fool on that last part.

    Slim

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  19. My April Fool's joke was to trick everyone into thinking I was actually a productive person with a social life. I cooked dinner for the in-laws, which was not too bad if I do say so myself, took my daughter shopping for much-needed summer clothes and even found them on sale, had about five people over to hang out that evening, and then had another couple over for pizza and a movie after THAT. It was perhaps the most activity I have managed to squeeze into a day since I became a mother.

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  20. Krista4:24 PM

    GOT MARRIED!

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  21. Beck, the one right up there, is the Queen of Bonus Holidays, just like she says. She's quite amazing at it! Puts the rest of us to shame. *lol*

    I took my son out to get a haircut and to a movie yesterday, but we did no fooling. Maybe next year!

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  22. I told my children they had to run upstairs! Right this very second! And put on fancy clothes! Because they were going to sing in front of everyone in church!
    Which they bought, I guess, but not that it mattered. The Boy made the Eyebrow (I'm so proud) and said, "I am NOT singing and wearing fancy clothes! NO. WAY." and then "whewed" when I said April Fool's. And then we explained the concept to the Girl, who then declared "April Fool!" after every conversation for the rest of the day. The End.

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  23. I can't claim any good pranks, but I did plan a hum-dinger of an Easter egg hunt last year that I'm looking forward to recreating this weekend -- each egg contained a clue (photos seeing my kids can't read yet) to the next egg and so on until the final clue lead them to their Easter baskets. It was great fun!

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  24. We forgot that it was April Fools until we were watching Little Bear. After that the kids pretty much copied everything that Little Bear did. I pretended to be fooled. I wish I had thought of the egg thing.

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  25. Charlotte10:39 PM

    In the afternoon, my husband was in the bathroom. Just as I heard the flush I rushed in and told him "Come Quick! There's a skunk on the porch!" I was completely convincing until he was peering out looking for it, when I declared April Fools and he promptly rolled his eyes and acted as if I was completely lame. The kids loved it though and we've found many "skunks" yesterday and today.

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  26. It was our son's first birthday. I had intended to turn people away at the door and tell them the party was canceled- 'April Fool!' but by the time things got started, I was too busy to follow through. Probably for the best- I don't want to set myself up for revenge at his future birthday parties!!

    But in honor of the Day, we bought a bunch of Groucho glasses and took pictures of our guests in them, which was darling. Toddlers with mustaches! What's not to love? We may make a tradition of it.

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  27. Meghan F-B11:56 PM

    Glad to see we weren't the only lame ones! No real April Fool's pranks here. I mean to every year, but never really manage to actually THINK of anything. When we were kids, my sister used to make me kool-aid, and then put flour in it (which turned into a gooey mess in the bottom of the cup.. but which I didn't notice until I got down there.). LOL! We are lame!
    Love your WT article, btw. It is SO true. They grow so fast, and everything seems to change overnight. And the questions my son (5) comes up with these days.. I wish I'd studied harder. Anyone know how tar is made?? Love the belly-cast thing! Poor Birdy!

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  28. My son (5) didn't appreciate the one tame "April Fools!" my husband played on him so that kind of took the wind out of the sails for the rest of the day.
    We also went to a birthday party for a 4 year old friend, but, alas, there were no Groucho glasses.

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  29. Catherine, I know this doesn't have anything to do with April Fool's (by the way, we didn't do anything for it anyway), but I just wanted to tell you something cute. I am an avid follower of your work. I read your entries every week and I have your book. It's gotten to the point where when I ask my daughter to come over to the computer to see something, she says in a bored voice, "Birdy?" Most times, yes, it is a picture of Birdy, but that's besides the point:-) Also, we feel a little connection to Birdy because our littlest girl is named Abigail. I didn't copy you, I swear. I didn't even start reading your blog on BabyCenter untill after she was born. But, I just thought that was a cute little commentary on my sweet family.

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  30. CatherinesFan1:21 PM

    We did the peach half in whipped cream too. Right before dd was going to throw a fit about not eating a *fried* egg, we said "what day is today?" She laughed and laughed!

    Also, I switched the places of dd's and dh's underwear. Dd laughed for about 5 minutes-seriously! Dh called me and said, "where is my underwear?" with dd giggling in the background.

    What a great day!

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  31. We were fostering a dog that week, so there were a few diarrhea jokes, like "I'm sorry to tell you this, but the dog had diarrhea all over the bedroom" and things like that.

    My husband told the kids there was snow outside when there wasn't and never has been. I gave him a lesson on April Fools jokes and how it is a bit cruel to tell a joke about a good thing and have it not be true. He always does that. I dont' think I can cure him of it.

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  32. My husband taught the four year old and the three year old the "there's something on your shirt" gag where you grab the person's nose when they look down. This went about as well as one might expect-- my daughter is now sporting a black eye.

    I thought about doing the fake egg thing, but me actually getting up and fixing breakfast on a Sunday would have been waaay too suspect in and of itself.

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  33. No real pranks. It's dh's b-day, and since he's had a ton of dumb pranks done to him as a kid (along with the way-lame teasing of being called a "Fool Baby"), I usually keep it pretty quiet. Busy Sunday, none-the-less as dd had a recital. I also cooked dh a nice b-day dinner AND made him a cake. And actually bought him a present this year. He probably thought he'd been subject to a wife swap for a moment there....!

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  34. My husband agreed to marry me if and only if there were no April Fools jokes ever. Not a big price to pay.

    Zeia (just turned 2) is too little to be amused by fake food, though I do have a list of meals like that on the computer when I know she'll be able to get a kick out of it.

    On my birth board at babycenter, I posted about how we took Zeia surfing for the first time and how she hung onto her dad's neck really tight. I said she's a good swimmer but the water was kinda cold so we took her out when her lips started turning blue. Then there was a link to a pic of her with the "April Fools!" But the link didn't work. Ugh.
    I did this bc I got ripped apart by the board a couple weeks ago after posting a real pic of my husband and I snowboarding with Zeia in the backpack.

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  35. We made the trick cake in the Family Fun magazine for my grandma (her birthday is April 2) you make it with pound cake toasted and use orange food coloring to dye frosting and then you spread it on to make a sandwich that is supposed to look like grilled cheese. Grandma was mostly blind and didn't really fall for it but my aunt who stopped by at the same time did and my boys were so excited.

    I got my boys last year with some fake gummy egg candies. I cooked eggs so it would smell right in the kitchen and made bacon. They totally fell for it.

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  36. For April Fools we wear our clothes backwards and wear 2 different shoes. My 4 year old daughter thinks this is just hysterical and I go along hoping everyone gets that it is April 1st...unfortunately, i don't think everyone remembers. My daughter also answered the phone and told my mom that she was me and used that kid pretend voice. Than yelled "April fools!!"We also had the mandatory..."there's a spider on your head"

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  37. Anonymous6:05 PM

    Well, last year for April Fool's Day, I told our son, Zachary, that we changed his name to Zachariah (a long standing issue with one of his preschool teachers), and he burst into tears, crying "I HATE MY NEW NAME!!" Then we said our April Fools and he laughed and laughed and then tried to "get" us for the next two weeks (ie, "Mommy, there's a chicken on your head. APRIL FOOLS!")

    This year we began the day by calling him Zachariah. He, being 6 now, is much more savvy and simply shrugged us off, saying, "I know what you're trying to do. You can't fool me." Later that night though, I called the house with my cell phone, then pretended to get a call from Disneyland (where we were headed the next day). I told my son that Disneyland was closed and that we wouldn't be able to go. I told him that he could go to Spring Break School, instead. He was very stoic. Finally, he asked me, "So when will Disneyland be open?" I then said, "APRIL FOOLS!" and with a huge sigh and laugh he jumped on me, telling me that he was really sad, but he wanted to show me that he was brave. Then he asked, "So, do we still get to have spring break school? APRIL FOOLS!"
    Denise

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  38. We celebrated by adopting a big hulking German Shepherd boy, 90 lbs. of love and flatulence! Come kiss him and let him give you some Love Gas!

    xoxo

    p.s. um, what is this, to fool an egg with whipped cream and a, how you say, a pitch? a peach? where I to learn this fool an egg?

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  39. tracey mcnamara6:11 PM

    We did fake meatloaf (cocoa krispy treats), mashed potatoes & gravy (vanilla ice cream w/caramel sauce), and peas n' carrots (green skittles - s's down - and cut up orange starburst). I insanely made the same dinner, for real. We served my Glen (6) the fake one first, and he fell for each part separately. Emma (4) had konked out on the couch, and when she woke up she fell for it too. My son loved being in on it. They loved dinnersert...

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  40. April fools day is the best for me. i have fooled many during that day!

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